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Sunday 14 March 2010
My Bankruptcy – An American Story, Part 2

On the personal side, I’d like to talk about the strange split in reactions you get when you tell people you are going bankrupt. For the most part people say they are so sorry, kind of like you told them an Aunt died or you have a serious illness. There is a strange little club as people (often in sotto voce voices) tell you they have been there. I am really amazed at the number of people I know who have gone bankrupt and I never knew.

For the most part people are very supportive (and I thank all of the ones that have offered support since I started writing this), but the ones that are not more than make up for it. Maybe it is the guilt and shame I feel for screwing up my financial life so badly that makes their reactions sting so much. I don’t know. It is hard to say that I am blameless, since I made the choices that got me here. Sure there were events beyond my control, but my reactions to the were part of what lead me here.

Still there are those that look at me as a cheat, as a failure, as fool who could not manage his money and now has to rely on the forgiveness provided by the Courts to get out of debt I willingly took on. The fact that it will kill my credit for years, that it will raise my insurance rates, that it will complicate getting a new job does not seem enough punishment for these folks. I don’t know if they want to lord their superior money management skills over me or if they are just striking out to make themselves feel like they are not as close to my position as they really are. It is still pretty traumatizing.

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